I went out with a new man the other day.
He had perfect teeth and luminous hair.
He had a cute earring and he was very charming,
But he wasn’t you.
I went out with another man, to forget my disappointment. And this one was strange, and he was kind.
He bought me dinner and held my hand, but it didn’t matter.
He wasn’t you.
Today I went out with someone else, someone I thought could be like you.
He was dark and handsome, went to school, and played the drums like you do.
But then I opened my heart to take him in, and there you were.
Taking up too much space, reminding me of your literal absence.
Tomorrow, I might move on
To someone new, who isn’t you, someone who might stay. But I think I’ll open the dark chest
Under my bed and pull out our love letters,
Reverently smooth over creases, read how deeply we cared,
Start to write your address on an envelope–
Then stop. And go to bed.